untitled.

pre script.
I try really hard to stay away from negative rants and complaining on my blog (which isn't the intention of this post, but I could see how it might be seen that way), and I REALLY don't mean to start a pity party or a "woe is me" but here it goes.

A lot of us, nay, all of us, know all too well the frustrations of dating and being single (as in not married, not necessarily not dating, but not dating can also be included).  These frustrations can come at any stage in life, right?

So, I really wish that when the topic comes up among friends and I try to give my two cents that every conversation wouldn't go like this.

How old are you?


25.


(almost always cue eye roll)


Just give it a few more years.  Till you're my age.

Why does it matter what age we are or aren't?  We're both on the same path.  Looking for that eternal someone and we both still haven't found them.  What does age have to do with it at all?  I'd put a pretty penny down that we won't even be defined by age in the eternities

I don't think age matters or that being older gives you more right to complain because we still both yearn for our eternal family to start.  What is a few more years going to do?  Give me more time to play and avoid responsibility?  Isn't that what our church leaders have counseled us not to do?  Not that we can't enjoy life.  We can have fun and take advantage of the time we have when we're single but our quest and our focus should be finding an honorable eternal companion during all of that free time and fun having.  Not sitting around until we reach a certain age and becoming frustrated and then doing something about it.

Sure, a lot of my current associates may have a good 3-5+ years on me, and I'm sure with each passing year it does get harder.  But someone being a few years older than me and single doesn't take away my insecurities when it comes to dating.  No matter how much younger I am, this is the stage that I am at and I'm trying to do what I can.  Just like you, just like everyone.

I have in mind what I'd like for a future husband and I try my best to have the qualities that one might like in a future wife all while trying to progress (and not always succeeding) on my own--working full time, developing new skills, maybe continuing my education--and I do those things to prepare for the future when that time does come to take a step closer to eternity.

Although it can get discouraging, it is still important that we don't let our situations get us down.  We need to focus on what we have and not what we don't have.  Sure, I look forward to marriage as much as the next person.  I think it's going to be great and that it will bring more opportunities to learn and grow in a unique setting.  But since I'm not there yet, I need to enjoy life now and all the benefits that my current stage brings, which mindset I hope to always have.  To be happy where I am, but not complacent.  To be content but always striving for more while not letting frustrations or disappointments in attempts hinder my progression to the next phase, and once we get to that next phase to keep progressing.
There is always room for growth and improvement.


That's all.

my admittedly naive perception of parenthood.

(source)

Sometimes I wonder what life will bring me as a mother.  I'm nowhere near that phase of life, but I find myself thinking about it often.  Obviously I don't know my future kids yet, since you know, I haven't had them yet and I probably need to meet another significant person first.  

If all would go according to my selfish plans, I would like to get married and work for the first few years of marriage to help save for the day when we do decide to start our family.  I don't know what phase of life my husband will be in when that time comes.  If he'll be in school or if he's already working full time.  I know motherhood/parenthood is important, but I want to be prepared for it, including financially.  Working for a few years will give me and whoever is at my side the opportunity to save so we can adequately provide for our future family.  But you hear over and over how people weren't planing on starting their family when she/their wife got pregnant and somehow they made it work, so I probably shouldn't worry that much, but me not worrying is like asking the sun not to shine.  Simply impossible.  

Motherhood is a responsibility that requires work.  Hard work that lasts past office hours (fatherhood too).  I admire women that stay at home with their kids all day long.  It is very selfless of them.  The same for men.  Lots of men are stay at home dads for one reason or another.

What about the woman who goes into the office?  Does she somehow fulfill her role of motherhood less?  I know I'm not a mom or a wife, so my opinion might seem skewed and naive, but I can still plan for the future.  I look forward to the day when I can stay home with my children and create a home while my husband works alongside me contributing to the environment of our home while working in the office and providing in a different way for our family. 

However, I'd rather err on the side of caution.  What if he can't get a job?  What if, heaven forbid, something happens and he is unable to work?  Or what if we have bills that we did not prepare for and his financial earnings are not enough?  

Am I making any sense?  

I guess what I'm trying to say is that some mothers work in the home and some work out of the home and they are both working for the love of their family.  Any mom is a full time working woman.  Men and women are equal in parenting.  For the most part their roles are different but perhaps at times they will have to help with the other's traditional role.  But at the end of the day they are equal.  Fighting for the same purpose, to protect and provide for their family.  

just for fun

I saw these two commercials at work today (we have the TV playing for patients in the waiting room--conveniently where my desk is located).

I don't know why, they're kind of silly, but they were just what my Monday needed.  Just a little something simple to brighten my day.  I hope they do the same for you. 





which led me to this one



oh.  and this one too. 

let freedom ring and dear boys 3 liberty style

The Fourth of July is one of my favorite holidays.  I just love it, love it, love it.  I know at times there seems to be a lot to worry about concerning the future of our country, but the Fourth seems to be the one day that we can forget all of those worries and focus on the great freedoms that we do have because of our founding fathers no matter who is currently sitting in the oval office.  America will always be the land of the free and the home of the brave. 

Three Fourth of Julys ago I was in Virginia (two I was in North Carolina, last I was in Idaho and this one I'm in Utah  I've almost made it coast to coast!).  I wish I could say that I took the time to reflect on what it was like to be within the vicinity of land rich with history that founded this great country.  But I didn't.  I was selfish and worried that I wouldn't see fireworks.  It was one of my first days in Virginia as a full time missionary.  We had the whole day planned out and it was going to be perfect.  A local member graciously agreed to take us and a lady we were currently teaching about 30 minutes away to Norfolk (which is home to one of the largest military bases) so she could witness a baptism.  

The day started out at approximately 100 degrees F and 100% humidity.  It was so freaking hot and I was dripping buckets of sweat within minutes of stepping outside.  The day went on.  We couldn't get a hold of the member who was going to take us.  The lady we were teaching called us and told us not only did she not want to go to the baptism but she didn't want us to come by anymore.  Not at all.  

I don't even know what we ended up doing that day.  But I do remember wishing I was at home with my family and on my way to the cabin where we would spend the day boating, grilling and watching fireworks.  I just wanted to see some fireworks.  As we pulled into the apartment complex that evening to finally end our day, off in the distance I saw some fireworks and it was the perfect ending to a perfectly trying day.  

This year I will be celebrating the 4th Salt Lake style by doing the most American thing possible.  Eating meat and watching fireworks.  

Also.

Elise, over at Elise's Pieces had FOUR new little images today to go along with her dear boys series and I couldn't pick just one.  So I fashioned up a little image and decided to use all four (Elise--I hope that's OK.  I put the source underneath.  If it's not, let me know and I will gladly take it down)

(source)

Dear America,

Thank you for being all cool and free.  I'm sorry people are freaking out about who your next leader will be.  But that's never going to change.

Dear Virginia,

Thank you for teaching me the importance and value of the military and all of our honorable service men and women.

Dear every military person ever and all of their family,

Thank you for all of your sacrifices that protect our freedoms.

Dear quiet boy,

We'll both be seeing fireworks tonight.  Too bad they're actual fireworks...

Dear past boy,

I hope you enjoy your 4th in DC.  I'm slightly jealous.